Babies and teenagers-hilarously similar

I came home today, and as usual had about a million jobs to do, most not self inflicted.
As I was tidying around with the babies in tow, the blinding reality hit me.
Teenagers and babies are very similar!
By some strange quirk of evolution babies grow up and become nice, responsible children, then for a period of about 4-5 years there seems to be an evolutional regression back to babyhood before the realities of adulthood and the responsibilities involved kick in.
Perhaps God designed it this way, as a sort of shield to give them one last little break before never ending adulthood embarks upon them?
So, you may ask, what are these similarities.
Here's my list, survived two teenagers, living with 4 teens and one pre teen (and with another three waiting to hit those years) as well as years of teaching teens has helped this list! I am sure you will be able to add to this.

• Babies tip everything out and leave a mess that they are incapable of tidying up themselves, teenagers make a mess, leave mugs, plates, bowls, towels etc out and 'seem' incapable of tidying up themselves (until threatened!)
• Babies scream and cry because they cannot vocalise what they want, teenagers scream and appear incapable of explaining whats wrong as well.
• Babies can't tell you whats bothering them, teenagers refuse too!
• Babies make a mess over their clothes by doing silly things in them, teenagers mess up their clothes by doing equally stupid things in them!
• Babies can make a fuss going to bed and wake up a lot at night, teenagers do not like going to bed at night and stay up as late as possible!
• It is hard to understand baby speak, it is equally hard to understand teenage boy grunting!
• Babies don't like to wash, neither do teenage boys!
• Babies can be very fussy eaters, teenagers are equally fussy (after a long period of eating everything put in front of them).
• You need to know where babies are all the time for their own safety, ditto teenagers!!!!
• Babies have no concept of money, ditto some teenagers!
• Babies demand a lot of attention, ditto teenagers!
• Babies need to be organised, ditto teenagers!
• Babies like messing around on a computer, so do teenagers.
• Babies love listening to music and dancing in a totally un co ordinated way, teenagers like doing this as well.
• Babies love pulling funny faces to make adults laugh, as the picture below clearly shows, so do teenagers.

I had quite a laugh looking at the babies and then understanding that my teens had more in common with them than they think! Not all of the list applies to my own children, I may hasten to add!!

Babies and Builders do not mix

This week has certainly been exhausting to say the least.
Having despised the downstairs loo/shower room for as long as I can remember, and spending a great deal of summers in there re-dong the botch up D.I.Y job the last owner made of it, FINALLY the day (or rather week) has come for me to hate it no more.
Ahhhh.....
It is being (as we speak) transformed into clean, fresh white and new in front of my eyes.
Sadly the rest of the house has been transformed in to the builder yard, with dust and bits everywhere.
The clear up operation at the end of the day is awful, and throughout the day the twins who will eat virtually anything other than food itself, pick up what they can.
So far I have yanked out of their mouths:

• nails
• drill bits
• cardboard
• foam
• plastic
• hairs
• tiles
• and things I do not know the name of.

The front door has had to be left open, Anya who can escape in the blink of an eye has tried on more than one occasion to make her break for freedom, and its colder inside the house than it is out!

Early on, I gave up and admitted defeat.

I cannot stay in chasing around.

I cannot get any work done at all.

I cannot tidy nor clean as it's going to get messy again.

I cannot contain two babies in one room all day.

So I have been out, braved the torrential rain and cold, but kept my sanity in tact. I have also managed to see a few people and buy a few presents so all is not lost!

My shower room is progressing nicely and will be done in just two more days.

I fear the clear up operation may take longer!

Some friendships do last forever.

Here are Irene and me aged 13.We were mad about Abba and had copied a pose they had on their current Album for this photo at my thirteenth birthday party.

Since I had moved from North to South London when I was six, Irene had been in my life.

At first just as a fellow class mate, it was in fact her friend Nicky I was closer too.

Then when I was around nine we became friends, then best friends.

We stayed this way, minus the endless arguments, fights, friends who tired to break us up ....until we parted to go to university.

After University I got married, and Irene was there by my side.

At separate ends of the country we kept in contact by phone and letters and tried to meet up at least once a year.

Us 39 years later at my eldest, Abigail's wedding last July.

Then we started to have children, our first three are very similar ages. Meeting up became more complicated, especially when we then moved overseas. There was quite a gap in us meeting, although we now kept in contact by mobile phone, emails and more recently facebook.

When I was marking in London a group of 'old school friends' all met up and Irene and I spent a whole night talking! Literally!!!

When my mother died, Irene and her mum made the long journey up from the south for her funeral, as they both had known her for many years.

When my eldest got married, Irene and her husband, Peter came across from the North West to join us for the day.

Last weekend, it was our chance to repay the recent visits. It was Irene and Peter's 25th Wedding Anniversary and we drove to Harrogate for a wonderful evening and meal. I met Nicky who I had not seen in 25 years and all Irene's cousins I remembered from my childhood.

It does not seem to matter how long we do not see each other for, not what life circumstances are so very different for us both, we still have the ability to just 'pick up' where we left off.

I will always be grateful I met Irene and have her in my life!

Some friendships really do last forever.

P.S. Irene is now 'Dr' in literature so I am sure she could write this far more eloquently than me! 

Huge congratulations Irene!

A matter of interpretation

Anya loves singing.
Granted you can't always make out exactly what it is, however by and large you can take an educated guess.
At our local mother and toddlers group we have a bit of a sing song every week before we all leave. One of the songs is 'bye bye friends' sung first in English and then in Welsh. The twins love it.
Encouraged they are assimilating two languages I was thrilled when Anya burst into song yesterday in her high chair.
'bye, bye....buggar'.....
Everyone was shocked then burst out laughing, of course she loves this, laughed and has sung it with gusto since!
Oh dear, I sense she has in fact assimilated English and teen speak instead!

The luckiest person alive

I have just come downstairs from feeding Anya.
It's 1.30am, the night is still young!
She is the waker and screamer. She has a super scream, so I tend to work until she wakes then belt upstairs to feed her at lightening speed, before she wakes her dad and twin who share the same room as her as well as the rest of the household!
As I lay there with her snuggled into me, I was filled with an overwhelming sense of fulfilment. Despite the tiredness (I know I have winged about this a lot recently) I still love feeding my babies in the middle of the night, when all is still and quiet and I can take deep breaths of their still sweet baby smell and try to hold onto this forever.
I felt I absolute must be the very luckiest person alive, to be fortunate to be able to have done this so many times, and again, in my late forties when most people are waving goodbye to their youngest, I am still holding mine in my arms.
I would not have it any other way.

The Crown

Mair loves wearing her crowns. she wears them everywhere, and has quite a collection of them now. Due to the twins liking to eat anything unrelated to food, a few have gone by the wayside this past year, sadly too.

She wears them for cooking.......

In her PJ's early in the morning when watching some TV.....

 When she is doing her jobs on a Saturday and around the house.....

and of course when she is dressing up.

Much too the embarrassment and disgust of the teenagers, she resolutely wears them when we visit places...

On the local beach in the summer......

and throughout her holiday this summer when she acquired a new one at a medieval market in Austria!

Mair loves her crowns, and I in turn love and admire her confidence to wear them throughout the year! I am painfully aware as she approaches the grand old age of 7, that one day, someone will tell her she is a baby for wearing them and then she will abruptly stop. They will be resigned to wearing at home, and gradually not worn at all, and passed on to Anya, who is already taking an interest in Mair's collection!

Childhood is a truly wonderful time. A time to explore, imagine and pretend. I really hope Mair is allowed to enjoy her's a little longer before the onset of the ever younger 'pre teens' ensues.

Boxing Day Dip 2012

Nina, Jay and their partners last year!

Some how, and don't ask me how, I have agreed to run into the sea on Boxing Day to raise money for our charity.

Susie, Miriam, Martha and Jono want to as well. So do some of my friends who have helped me raise money for my charity.

I am praying for a mild Christmas!

If you would like to donate to our charity and support me (I hate cold, water, feeling wet etc) then you can sponsor us for as little as £1.50 -cheaper than a coffee!

Our goal is to raise £1,000.

Here is the link below:

http://www.justgiving.com/Susie-Beavan

Many thanks!

Fiona

When having twins is TOTALLY exhausting.....

We are no on day 9 of roughly three hours sleep.
It's our own fault. They were settling into a routine. Caleb slept through the night, Anya always woke between 1-2.30am. They have not been easy sleepers and so we were down on hours anyway.
Then we went away.
They were great but their routines were totally disturbed.
This hasn't had any effect on them in other holidays, but for some reason this time it has.
They have systematically destroyed the house on a daily basis, working as a tiny 19 month hurricane throughout, you cannot take your eyes off them for a second, and I mean a second.
At night they settle, then they wake.
Piercing, ear bending screams.
The have woken up just about everyone else as well.
Anya eventually listens to reason (well, the tired, strong voiced reason!) and gives up.
Caleb has not.
The only way he will sleep is on me.
This is not conjusive to rest.
We have now set up the travel cot downstairs and I have settled him there, out of ear shot of the others at least and hopefully letting Simon have a little more rest. I have sat downstairs untill his crying subsides. He really seems to be suffering separtion anxiety, however I am sensing a little stuborn, strong willed personality in there as well!
It has been increasingly hard to do anything of any value after we have settled the younger children. I have managed to plan and mark my students work, but that's about it. My book, sewing , diet, excercise plan and master's work, have sadly been shelved whislt survival is most important.
Daily life has become a large yawn.
I usually cope really well with sleep deprivation but this has even hit me hard.
I hope and pray they settle down soon.

We have made our boxes!

We used to make  6 or 7 of these, now the older children do ones at school. Jono and Mair were still very keen to do their boxes and loved selecting all the little things to go inside. It is amazing how much you can find around our house that has not been used! the rest we bought from Poundland at a minimal cost to us.

This year all the boxes from Colwyn Bay are going to Belarus.

Incase you have no idea where that is I have included a map! Looks pretty chilly there, so I am glad we included hats, scarves and gloves.
When the boxes are finished they look so appealing it is always hard to prize them off the younger ones!
It is a lovely thing for them to do each year, and as I have previously said, brings home the true meaning of Christmas, 'it's in giving and not recieving'.

Joshua's tree

This is Joshua's Tree. Infact there are two trees, one behind the other. When Joshua died two sets of friends bought us a tree on a conservation site nearby. We have the certificates. We chose our trees and have visited them each year to watch them grow.

It's a pretty steep climb up, so I haven't managed it for two years now, and we had to leave the twins at home to come up this weekend as well. We seem a bit depleted as only jono and Mair came with us. We tidy them both up, hang things on them and enjoy the beauty of the surroundings.

Mair particularly enjoyed finding berries and bits and bobs to place around the tree this year.

The view over The Conwy valley is stunning and it is good to see something growing when he is not. His trees, that remind us of him, and now remind us as they grow so big, of how long he has been absent from our lives.

It's a matter of perception

Rather old but sums us up!

Today someone said something very interesting.
I don't know them, and when they found out I had 11 children, after the initial shock and inevitable questions they said 'I would have stopped after the first ones, don't you want your life back?'
It really got me thinking.
You see the children are MY LIFE.
I had my childhood which was 'interesting', I had University which I loved and met my husband there on the first day! we then left, and after a year we got married.
By the time we had been married a year, I was four months pregnant with Abigail.
After this 17 pregnancies have followed, resulting in 11 children.
I have managed to forge a career, run a charity and upgrade and develop my qualifications as well.
Yes, sometimes I would love to spend a whole day sewing or creating something artistic, but would I want to do this everyday, day after day, or to have the joy of another little life.
No choice, the baby wins hands down.
My children have supported me through the good times and made me howl with laughter in the most dire of circumstances.
My life is the children, and I am totally happy with that. It's what I have chosen and where I want to be, it is who I am, and their personalities and interests shape the person I become.
So, no,I don't want my life back or any other life, I have a wonderful life with my amazing family!

Why on earth do we Brits stand in the cold and damp every Nov 5th to remember a 500 year old historical event?

Why couldn't Robert Catesby, who organised the Gunpowder Plot have organised his attempt to blow up The Houses of Parliament and King James 1 in the summer months?

It would have been so much more appealing to watch thousands of pounds worth of fireworks go off on a lovely warm summers evening.

But no, he chose November. The 5th to be precise.

Remember remember the fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot.
I see no reason why gunpowder, treason
Should ever be forgot...

As a child, we had to learn this rhyme in school. These days my children are hard pushed to be able to tell you anything about the event.

Years ago we made 'Guys'. It was great fun to dress up the man we made, put him on a wagon and go around the neighbourhood collecting 'a penny for the guy' for our efforts. The accolade to this event being burning him on top of the bonfire.

We don't have 'Guys' anymore. I rather suspect we are now too 'Politically correct' to burn effigies on fires, heaven forbid the horrific images this would create in our offsprings minds!

Actually I was not traumatised by the event at all and neither were my eldest children.

When we moved to Prague and started the school there, we decided to celebrate Guy Fawkes night. What we did not anticipate was perhaps how weird this looked to the outside world. The Czech caretaker and his wife who lived opposite the school looked positively horrified at the burning of the guy, obviously convinced this was some strange 'western' ritual. Our American parents were also somewhat perplexed but joined in with gusto and embraced this strange celebration!

The Gunpowder Plot failed in it's attempt to blow up King James and stop the persecution of Catholics. Around midnight on November 4, 1605, one of the conspirators, Guy Fawkes, was discovered in the cellar of the Parliament building with barrels of gunpowder. Fawkes and other men involved in the plot were tried and executed for treason. 

For some strange reason we still celebrate this event with fireworks, sparklers and toffee apples . My children all love this celebration each year. I feel sad in recent years it has now been completely over taken by Halloween.

I hope I have explained this celebration fully to those who have absolutely no idea why we celebrate this event.

Is going away with a large family actually a break?

Some of the children and Simon at Breakspear Crematorian, Ruislip.

Having taken my large family away now for over 20 years, I have concluded that you do not have a break in the conventional sense of the word, but rather a break from the normal routines, all the daily hassle, the activities and work and rather have a time together. In this sense it is a break.

Saying this, taking 19 month old twins to London can hardly be considered restful!

The children and Simon

We started our time away with the usual four hour plus car journey to London. The children were all very good and the babies slept. we did it all in one go and arrived at Breakspear Crematorian Ruislip, with nearly an hour and a half before they closed.

My family tree

My father, brother and mother's ashes are all scattered here, so I love to visit once a year on her birthday.It is the only chance I get. We made little decorations to hang on my family tree. The children see this as very important and the three eldest who could not come due to other commitments were upset not to visit there grandmother here.

Watching the embankment entertainment

The first night we stayed in a Travel Lodge on the M4,which was surprisingly quiet and as it was right next to the motorway services meant I could take the older ones for a coffee in Costa whilst the younger ones slept. It is often hard when staying over night to know what to do with the older ones as the age spread is now much larger and when you are all stuck in just two rooms it's rather limiting!

Us on a bridge over the Thames

The downside of the cheap travel lodge deal we got was you can only stay in one place for one night so it meant packing up all our things the following morning and moving onto the next place. Once parked we bought day cards up to London. We had a lovely day walking from Waterloo Station along the embankment and over the footbridge to Covent Garden where we looked at shops and ate lunch.

Martha, Bella and Anya standing by the world's tallest man

We then walked through Leicester Square to Piccadilly and up Regent Street where Simon walked right past the former England football manager, Fabio Cappella! The teens loved all the shops in Regent Street and Oxford Street so we left them there and walked the younger ones to Selfridges to see the Christmas displays in the windows.

Christmas magic

By this time it was cold and wet too! I walked past another celebrity and her baby too! Mair and Jono loved the lights and all the displays. I can vividly remember my father taking me up by train each year to see the displays so I really wanted to take my own children as well. We then headed back by bus (we were not allowed on two because the buggy places had been taken!!) to Waterloo and then to the travel lodge. We fed the little ones happy meals on the train as it was very late and once settled headed out for take away food for the eldest ones. A long day and late night!

Mair and Daddy getting wet!

After a hot breakfast (children go free!) we packed up again and drove to Thorpe Park where we deposited the eldest children for the day. With the youngest ones we drove a further half an hour to Legoland. What a drive through Virginia Water and Suningdale! I have never ever seen so many gated mansions one after another in my life!

Jono

Mair , Jono and the twins had a fantastic day in legoland. It is a wonderful place with so much to do and to see! We did not leave until 7pm. By this time we were all exhausted, and then had to drive back to Thorpe Park to collect the equally exhausted eldest three. The drive to Pizza Express in Kingston was remarkably quiet as everyone was asleep! the meal at Pizza Express was also very quiet as everyone was exhausted! It was quite a pleasant change!

Jono, Mair and Anya enjoying the sea life from a pod!

We all stumbled into bed in Tolworth Travel Lodge far too late and all slept till nearly 9 am! I always find it strange staying in Tolworth Travel Lodge as it used to be the M.O.D offices my mother worked in and I visited regularly! My father also worked there as well. There is a strange comfort coming back to visit.

Caleb not loving the wind

After another hearty breakfast (eat all you want kids!!!) we drove around Tolworth where I spent my childhood and past my old family home, before heading to Richmond Park for a wander before the rain set in. I always loved Richmond Park as a child and teenager and have so any happy memories there it is always great to come back and visit.

Jono building a den

The children loved watching all the deer close up, making dens and generally running around, as well as having a snoop at The Royal Ballet School which is house in The White Lodge in the middle of the park. After a hot drink we headed into Kingston for a bit of Christmas shopping before the long drive home.

Mair, Jono and Anya in Richmond Park

It was a great time, very busy and packed to the brim as always.We made the most of both the Travel Lodge Autumn deals and our Tesco Vouchers to have meals and free admittance to places. If you are careful to watch out for these deals and collect vouchers you can do this relatively cheaply as we have found.

A break?

Well yes it was.Great to be away with the children and spend time with them without all the other everyday distractions.