That was not what I expected.....

Today was certainly eventful.
I am amazed after so long away from work how quickly I adjusted and threw myself back into things.
Well I had too.
It was a mess.
Miraculously I managed to get out the door, having dressed and fed the three youngest children, with them all in tow. The childminder was equally impressed, I think , like me she harboured her reservations I would make it in time!
It was hard to leave the babies so I made parting swift. The blessing with teaching is that it is so full on and so busy you have no time to dwell or think about anything else. I was grateful of that fact today.
I got to work ten minutes early! Unheard of!
The rest of the day was spent trying not to slit my throat as the horrors of what my students had not achieved in my ten months absence unfolded. Enough said.
Having just three and a half hours sleep, and actually not caring if I was fired helped! I do wish I had my husbands skill for getting his point across, articulately but firmly and politely. I just don't have that ability. I say it as it is, maybe it's the reddish hair and the scottish blood!
I wonder just how much I can humanly teach in 18 weeks, 108 hours.

It was good to be back, and I love teaching, I realised how much I did miss it too. I am good at it, and it's nice to be able to do something really well. My students missed me, and I had missed them too. How lucky am I!

18 weeks and counting....

No, I have not been hiding another pregnancy!
This is how long I have left at work! before my students leave, and as a part time lecturer, hourly paid, my contract ends.
18 WEEKS!
I loathe returning to work this time. No matter how many times I try and rationalise things, I still feel upset.
I have never felt quite so reluctant before and I am unsure why.
I love my job, and the students I have in the current cohort are fantastic girls. I enjoy teaching Children's Learning and Development, and of course have many funny real life stories and anecdotes to liven up my lessons. Perhaps some of my hesitation is because my temporary replacement could not have made more of a hash of a very straightforward course if he had tried! which clearly he had not!
Maybe it is because I have had the twins and I am very aware of what an absolute surprise, joy and blessing they have been to us. I want to enjoy every moment of their own development knowing this could well be the final time I will see each precious stage.
Or perhaps, after my mother died, and I had to slow down as I was pregnant, I realised I had been too busy, far too busy. I have many regrets. I do not want to feel this guilty or busy again.
It has made me change my whole perspective and I no longer am returning to work with anything like the hours I had before. I am trying hard to set up some work from home to enable me to still bring in an income, as without this we cannot make ends meet. This is our choice , as we have a large family, so I just have to find new and creative ways.
In many respects I am grateful for this 'eureka' experience and excited to see what the next year will bring.
Until then, I return, one day a week, to my lecturing job, and the twins will go to a childminder. It has taken me all day to organise their things as well as my work!
Let's hope we all settle down in our new routines tomorrow.

Hi ho hi ho it's back to bootcamp I go!

No longer can I use the excuse that it's Christmas /New Year/ eating up leftovers etc....
I have to bite the bullet and drag myself back to Bootcamp.
At my age there is no other way, sadly.
I started well in October and dropped a dress size and half a stone. Then I was ill several times during November and December was written off with Panto rehearsals and hundreds of activities for the children.
So here we are, January.
I have precisely five months until Abigail (my eldest) gets married and I fit into the size 10 dress.
Haha.
All the tried and tested weight loss strategies have failed this time round. I am the wrong side of forty five and my metabolism is letting me know it.
I will not give in!
So next week Bootcamp is at 6.30am.Yep, 6.30 AM!!!!!!!! Three early mornings a week, with the trainer from hell and two evening slots.
It has got to work.
There's the diet as well.
By bye red wine, Baileys, bread, caffeine, sugar, refined foods, cheese, and in fact anything I love to eat.
Hello Austerity!
Still, every time I look at my beautiful twins, the five stone (urgh yes 5 stone! that's 70 lbs) was worth it.
I have managed to have 14 pregnancy's and loose the weight between each new baby successfully. I intend to do it again.
It is hard, I hate early morning, exercise and diets.
Keep checking my progress.

What not to do with a stapler.....

Ella (grand baby) came to play today whilst Abie cut the kids hair ready for the new school term.
Mair and Ella played very happily (for a change) outside, in the treehouse and then inside dressing up and then with the dollies, and cutting and glueing.
It then went silent for a while, not a long while, until we heard ..
'MAIR!"
"ELLA'
Down comes Susie with the two culprits in tow looking very sheepish.
Okay, so Mair had found one of the teens staplers and crept upstairs. Out of the hundreds of potentially dangerous pass times she could have engaged in with this instrument, she chose to staple Ella's hair (apparently Ella's suggestion) TO THE WALL!, the bedroom wall, and the room Susie was revising in. This leads to many questions, foremost being was Susie so involved in her revision she managed to miss this???
Mair looked a bit bemused and perplexed at everyone's reactions.
Let's hope she doesn't repeat this at school, although I must admit to daydreaming about stapling some of my past students to a wall from time to time.
Maybe it's an inherited reaction?

Getting back into a routine..

It always signifies the end of the holidays when we start nagging the children to 'get back into a routine'.

Who are we kidding?

It is virtually impossible to do, other than the hard way!

In reality this is how it usually goes:

 Day 1 go to bed very late, get up very early, yawn and grouch all day, go to bed very early.

It tends to work that way with the teenagers anyway. Suddenly their body clocks, used to getting up between 6-7 am for school dramatically change. The house is eerily silent until midday when they stumble out of bed. At the other end, my peaceful late nights are invaded by noise, out of tune singing, loud tv and people wanting to chat to me till silly o' clock. This routine has actually been clinically proven to suit the teenager best, however no one has yet informed the Department of Education so sadly they have to try to readjust. Having just had my 13 year old down here moaning she has been in bed tossing and turning for hours this is not an easy thing to do.

Gone are the days of sitting around, relaxing, watching Christmas TV and eating. Homework diaries have been located, and homework and course work have been somewhat grudgingly done. The twins have GSCE Artwork (the 15 year old ones, that is!!!) and the 18 year old has Philosophy and Ethics Modular exams. Thankfully my degree and interests are in Art and Theology so at least I can help and advise. Had they been revising Science or Languages they would have pulled the short straw asking me to advise as I spent most of those lessons outside the classroom rather than in them, but that's another story!

I am tidying, locating uniforms, checking no essentials need to be bought and trying to get my brain around the fact on Friday I have to go to work, after 9 blissful months at home,with all my lesson plans and admin done! Oh Lord! I can relate to my children's less than enthusiastic responses now.

9 months! well actually about 10.5 really.

I have never been away so long, and never had less motivation to go back.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job, I feel I am so fortunate to have a career I enjoy so much. I just love being at home too. There lies the dilemma.

If my memory serves me correctly there was once a business woman with 8 children who wrote a book about having it all, e.g., a career and a large family.

I am sorry but it's impossible.

There is always a compromise and always guilt.

This time I have chosen to stay at home mainly and make the sacrifices in other areas. These are my last (sob) babies, unless a miracle happens (pleaseeee) so I intend to enjoy their baby days as much as I can.

I need to work, we cannot support everyone on one wage so I will work around the babies. I am fortunate to be able to do this, through day work, evening lecturing and examining which is done online at home.

Large families need a routine. Two weeks without one has been in many ways wonderful, and in others frustrating. Without a routine it is hard to get everyone out the door, in our case it seems before lunchtime! Everyone doing 'their own thing' means rounding up the children can take F-O-R-E-V-E-R.

We once went on holiday with a single friend. Granted the children were all much younger but she could not comprehend how it could take an hour from parking a car to leaving a car park! (Babies to change, buggies to construct, lunches, toilet, toys to find, arguments, lost cameras etc).

The children know where they are with a routine, we have daily job lists and lists for all their activities. It is fairly complex with so many but when we all get back into the pattern it goes smoothly like a well oiled bicycle. I thrive on routines, I do not get half as much achieved without them, so, I  for one will be glad to get back into the swing of things tomorrow.

We went to the zoo today

Mair

Well only me, Simon, Jono and Mair really. We have a season ticket to The Welsh Mountain Zoo, which is handily situated 5 mins from our house. It is a great place to walk around for a few hours with the children, who never tire of going there until they hit 13.
We decided not to take the twins as they both have stinking colds, and it was cold and extremely windy today. They were both happily asleep, all the teens were in doing home work so it meant we had a couple of hours free.
It was strange to just take two children out!

Jono

We actually looked like a normal sized family! No stares, no one asking us any questions, we just blended in. Very odd.
I missed the babies, and the other children. I kept doing a  head check and then realising I didn't need too.
I did enjoy just spending some quality time with my 5 and 10 year old, talking to them about the things they have enjoyed this holiday without interruptions. I hope they did too.
For anyone who doesn't know, the Zoo is on top of a mountainside and very exposed. It was cold! and windy. I don't much like the crocodile house (maybe a throw back from watching 'Crocodile Dundee' too many times) however today it was one of the most appealing places to visit as it was lovely and warm!
Mair chased around on her little bike, and Jono on his new stunt scooter so they were warm. Simon ran after them both, I meandered,something I don't often get the opportunity to do!

Sea Lion show

Rhos on Sea from the Zoo

The meercats were feeling the chill as they were all huddled up together and the gibbons looked very cold and miserable. The tigers as always looked worryingly hungry and very enthusiastic when Jono lost control of his scooter on the hillside by their den and careered towards them! Thank God for the three fences! The chimps as usual were eating all kinds of gross things that make Jono and Mair laugh and me want to throw up and the parrots as always were not playing ball to Jono trying to teach them all sorts of rude words! I gave the outside seal and penguin show a miss, and resided in the cafe whilst this was on enjoying the surrounding views.

Conwy from the Zoo

It was good, albeit cold, to take a few hours out of our schedule to walk around with some of the children, before the business of the next term starts. The twins meanwhile, slept through, and woke up blissfully aware we had ever been out at all!

How we celebrated.....

Luke in full swing

Martha

Dad and Mair

Mair could not contain her excitement!

How to entertain twins!

Dad

As a large family was a large age span too,  it is often hard to please everyone all of the time, well near impossible. Everyone, no matter what age, however enjoys going bowling, so for a couple of years now, on New Years Eve this has been the family treat! We follow this with a meal in Pizza hut.We rarely do these things (just too expensive) so they are a real treat, and enjoyed by everyone. We used to suffice with a night in and videos but now we have a lot of teenagers this seems a bit 'lame'. I am always encouraged on New Years Eve that many other families have much the same idea and it's always a good atmosphere at the super bowl. This year we raided Asda afterwards for Pizzas and snack foods, as the twins are ill and wingey and not up to a restaurant! we ended up making a wise choice! as they were up most of the night (again).

Jono

Tea time!

After the fireworks were over, we finished a film, the kids went to bed and I headed off into town at silly o'clock to pick up our 18 year old and some friends, do the taxi run, and return home. simon had gone to bed to feed the babies and the kids had tidied up behind themselves but sadly the washing up fairy had not done her job, neither had the tidy up the food table fairy, so another half hour was spent doing these jobs. By then I was awake so I wrote my blog and had a cup of coffee. Collapsed into bed at about 3.30am only to be woken by Anya screaming the place down at 4am. Nothing was working for her so sat rocking her until 5.15am, slumped to sleep and Caleb woke at 6.15am. Simon got up and fed him, but he has a stinking cold and teething too, so his cries woke up Anya at 6.45am. She has a bottle, coughed and projectile vomited the lot over me and the bed!                                                                     We all somehow drifted off to sleep until around 9am.

Anya joining in the conversation

The joys of twins, sharing a room, our room!
I look convincingly hung over, even though I am sober through about 10 days sleep deprivation. I have absoulty no idea how, on Friday I will get out the door at 8am with twins to the childminder and then get to work and teach all day!
 Happy New Year zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.