Being sick with 21 month old twins is no joke!

Just as my twins recover from the violent sickness and diahorrea bug they have had for a week, they have graciously passed the germs on to another five of the children and me as well.
It has been pretty quiet with them both ill and sick. the laundry pile went up considerably as they systematically puked their way through the house on more than one occasion, and Caleb beat the crap out of Anya as he cannot get his head around the fact he is a twin and will NOT tolerate her sharing a knee, cuddle or in fact any part of me whatsoever, that he sees as his personal property!
So now I have had it, magnificent timing as ever, my masters assignment is due in this week, what a classic and all my courses are ending so there is a lot of work attached to these as well. As mentioned several of the children were ill too, so we have had to deal with this in its many forms. By Thursday I felt truly dreadful, so bad in fact that once the children were dressed and off to school I crawled back to bed and put books on the floor for the twins to play with. I didn't intend to dose but I did, for about ten minutes, they seized the opportunity, made for my makeup and plastered themselves, the cot, the windows and curtains and just about anything else they could lay their hands on with my lipstick! Not the cheap stuff but my MAC one!
Half an hour of clear up later, I was amazingly brighter, the shock of seeing them both jarred me out of my sick slumber its fair to say. I managed to survive the rest of the morning with the old tried and tested sucessful methos of briabry! Toast, cereal and Peppa Pig! and even managed to persaude them to an afternoon sleep before crawling onto the sofa myself.
It wasnt an easy day, I was thankful the next day was work, which I could not go to, but the twins still went to the childminder. I dont remeber a day in 25 years where I have been sick and not had a child too look after as well. It was a first! Theoretically speaking Martha was ill and at home, but at 15 thankfully slept till 2pm and only demanded a parcetomol from me!
So, with trying to construct 4,000 logical words at such a high level I have been off the radar. I have finnished now (hurrah) and start the next module next week!

Planning our road trip this year

Austria 2009

Every year , we go on a road trip.
We have done so for over 24 years now, although there have been years this has not been possible.
Road trips are fairly common place for larger families for obvious reasons, no expensive flights! although given this current climate of large families being filmed everywhere they go, one would be lead to believe road trips have just been invented! (the cynic in me feels publicising such events maybe a good way to pay for them!)

France 2005

We are planning a big once in a life time road trip in a couple of years so need to save more. This years road trip needs to be low budget so over Christmas I set about trying to find some cheaper accommodation.This was actually easier than I thought.
For us, it means staying a little more 'off the beaten track' than usual but I am sure life will as always be fascinating and the children will enjoy the change.
To take children on holiday, takes courage. I have some friends who freely admit they didn't even bother going to the beach till their children were three.

France 2005

To take lots of children away for weeks on end takes lots of courage! as well as planning meticulously  with the teachers rule of thumb 'what can go wrong will go wrong'. Planning for every eventuality really helps and gives a peace of mind. Thankfully, for us this has never happened, but knowing where the local Dr and hospital are, is always a good idea!
I use the word 'holiday' in the broadest sense, as I can never really relax, especially when the children were all very little and you had to keep your wits about you 24/7. However I still enjoyed the break from the routines and sight seeing!
For the last year or so I have been working with an agent on the framework for a book about living and working and holidaying overseas. Putting together 25 years of tips, tales and experiences has been fun. Hearing others tales has been equally amusing. We are no where near finishing it any time soon, but there's no rush, as each year passes more will be added!!!
For now, I will again, blow the cobwebs off my trusty holiday planner, that I add items too each year, and start to plan our list for this year. The beauty of being teachers is, although we have to take our holidays at the most expensive time of the year, we can at least go away for a good month or so, as we have found when you get there, you can actually live on the same budget, or even less than at home!

Prague 2007

 We like to go to the non-tourist spots, we live with the locals, shop in the local shop, chat to them and join in their festivals and celebrations much to the children's amusement /bemusement! It is a great learning experience to live in a totally different part of the world for a few weeks and absorb the culture.
Like wise to have the privilege  as we have of living somewhere very different is just wonderful, and a memory the older children hold dear forever.
And so, amidst yet another dreadful bout of sickness and diahorrea twin style, we hold fast to our great summer escape and the adventures we will have together.

Why babies are a blessing for handling teenagers!

The birthday season is on us once again.
Three in January and four in March and April.
February give us time to recover slightly.
Martha's 15th party is this weekend.
She is very excited.
At 15 , this broadly consists of her group of friends coming over, playing dance games on the wii and xbox, chatting and having a nice meal, before some leave and others stay for a 'wake over' as I call them, as no one generally sleeps!
We were talking about this years forthcoming event in the car today.
Martha: My friends cant wait to come over!
Me: why?
Martha: because they LOVEEEE Dad's cooking and your ice cream
Me: That's great
Martha: and they cant wait to see the babies again, in fact I think they are more excited about seeing the babies than seeing me mum. They were all arguing who was going to look after who and play the game 'pass the Caleb' that they all found so funny.
Me :Really?
Martha is one of only two or three of her friends to have babies still. I am the oldest mother to reproduce as well! All her friends have photos of the babies, constantly ask how they are and await the latest tales and updates.
It is all so sweet, and Martha enjoys talking about their latest achievements and antics with a captive audience.
Her instagram holds endless pictures of them both, and her tweets are about then as well, as are the other teens internet postings as well.
They love the babies with all their hearts. No matter what their day has been like or the moods they are in they always have time for them and give them endless love and affection. I can honestly see nothing but positives of having these two little people in their lives.
I know their friends all feel the same!

Changes to this blog.

I am increasingly feeling uncomfortable about making this blog open to anyone to read.
Locally I am not sure I want everyone to know what I am doing and when, and likewise when I did a few google searches I felt my children's identities and photos were not as private as I had hoped.
I really enjoy writing the blog but am increasingly feeling I want to cypher who reads it.
Untill I decide what to do, if anything I will remain writing a few things here.
I have really enjoyed getting to know some of you, but have never felt that comfortable writing in such a fashion where everything is so very open.
Fiona

The digital photo frame

Not this Christmas just gone, but last Christmas, my husband bought me a digital photo frame.
It has sat in a box for a year.
I am no good with technology and had not a moment to work out what on earth to do with it, and to be honest thought it was a waste of money.
My husband has nagged me for a year. Never sick, he has been off work for a week with the dreadful never ending virus that has now plagued our home for 5 weeks.
Feeling too ill to do work, he took it upon himself to put the photos onto my frame.
Little did he know how many I take.
Serial digital photo downloader here!
About 11,000 photos and a week later, and quite a lot of muttering and cursing....it has been completed.
It has 1,400 images right back to 2003 when we first bought a digital camera, to take photos of Joshua's brief little life.
Plugged in, on our mantle piece, I have to admit I love it, and often glance up at the images flashing by.
All the happy times, the places we visited, our dear friends, school events,general large family living, the children as babies, toddlers and juniors. It has cataloged the last ten years of our lives.
Everyone loves it, although the teenagers groan at their "gawky' phases and awful dress sense!
What a blessing that little frame is and I now look forward to adding too it each year.

Absence

Sorry I have not been around much, but once again we both caught 'the bug' and have been ill for over two weeks.
Someof the children re caught it too.
It has now been going round our house for 5 weeks and shows no signs of apeezement.
We have started back at school and work, and I have over 70 students to observe in their school placements as well as a masters assignment to write, and three birthdays.
There are only so many hours in the day, and I think I am using them all up.
I will be back, but right now other things must come first.

Bootcamp is going to be replaced this year by.....

The great learn to run for the northern run!
Given I am absolutely the worst runner in the entire universe of running this will be quite a challenge.
My husband, a runner, fell around laughing at the mere proposal, so what did I do, well of course I applied for the ballot for the Northern Run.
13.1 miles around Newcastle and Sunderland.
Hmm
I can run for about a minute before falling to the ground in a heap.
So, I have my new training app, curtesy of the Northern run website.
It guarantees I will, if I follow it, be able to run for a whole 20 mins in 8 weeks.
I cannot wait!
It will be nothing short of a miracle.
So tonight, we got the babies to sleep, watched the news headlines and then at 10.20 in the wind and cold, braced the outdoors for my first, 20 min fast walk.
Thankful we live by the sea and at least even in the dark it's scenic at least.
The other plus is I can do this with Simon instead of leaving him to look after the children whilst I go to the gym.
The other plus is it's cheap! Very cheap. This is good!
So next time its the 1 min run one 1 min .
Oh dear, the running starts.
Watch this space.

The memories that clothing evokes

9.5 years ago when Jono was just 2 and Susie was 9.

As I laid away all the Christmas Decorations in the attic, a job I had been putting off for months could no longer be avoided.

I went through the attic and found all the next years clothing for the twins, substantial as there are boxes of girls and boys clothing.

I still have to sort and pack away their present clothing, another odious task, but at least I have found the next sizes for both of them, thus saving a lot of trudging around shops and wasted money.

It is always so very bitter sweet laying away each stage of clothing, as it marks, sadly the passing of that stage of babyhood, and as at my age, each child is an amazing blessing, I am very much aware with the twins it is probably, the last time we will see this stage (but you never know!!!)

Something really sad hit me today as I took out all Jono's clothing and washed and dried this.

It has lasted perfectly in the attic for nine years, as our house has a large weight towards girls, rather than boys.

The clothing was packed away when Jono was two, when I was pregnant with Joshua, and the photos I have of Jono holding Joshua, are the clothes I am now laundering for Caleb to wear, as Joshua never had the chance to grow so big.

Jono cuddling Joshua

As I folded them, I remembered all the times Jono had worn them. Above is a photo of him in some of these with Susie. It's a good job little boys clothes are fairly timeless, as Caleb now has a huge new selection.

The strange thing is that Caleb looks a little like Joshua did, It is strange to see Joshua's very distinctive and different features on him, and how he is growing and developing gives me little flashes as too what Joshua may have looked like too.

Caleb Joshua

Perhaps it is a little ironic that in the year we celebrate Joshua's 10th Birthday, Caleb will be wearing those clothes. It is also comforting as well. They will defiantly be kept long after he has grown out of them, as precious memories of my sweet little boys.

What a disaster!

Anya feeling far from happy-I am with you there my girl!

It's fair to say this Christmas has rated as one of my worst.
Why?
Because of this blessed virus that has swept around our house with a vengeance, try as we might it does not want to go away.
Before Christmas the twins had it, and screamed the place down every night for over a week.I have never felt so deranged going into Christmas, then the other kids got it, then Simon got it and was ill for well over a week, I have never seen him that ill for years. This put paid to Christmas week, he managed the dinner, a supreme effort given how lousy he was feeling. Just as he recovered and we planned to do a few things with the children it struck me with a passion, and the twins once again!
I have felt grim.
So grim I have been unable to do very much at all, other than be a snuggler for movies and in my brighter moments a little more , other than the usual stuff that has to be done, that is!
I feel we have not done all the lovely things that we do, that the children have not been out as much as I had hoped and that it has well and truly spoilt some of the magic.
Stupid virus!
Bah humbug!

Where has this year gone.

My mother always used too say that the older you get, the faster time goes by.
It's true.
When I was a teenager time dragged, I remember.
Or was it just the utter boredom of revising for all those exams?
Now the years seem to fly by, and try as I might to hold onto my children's babyhoods and then childhoods they seem to be rapidly disappearing in front of my eyes and I hate it!
Each year, I take around 2-4,000 photos which I keep, print out , make books and stick in journals, to record our memories.
I look back on the year as I am doing it.
It is so very easy to look at the half empty glass, the things that worry us, that don't work, that cause us problems and stress, rather than the half full glass.
Choosing the half full glass, I would rather remember all the happiness that has outweighed these things.

• The health of us
• The health of our children
• Our jobs- that thank God , we still have!
• Our house, cramped and packed as it is.
• The lovely garden we have for the children to play in.
• The beautiful place we live and all the amazing things we can do.
• The joy the children bring us each day, the laughter that overpowers,the company, friendship and love.
• Our friends and the support and love they bring to us both and our kids.
• The simple pleasures in life, watching our friday night video, a lovely home cooked meal, a painted picture, a morning cuddle......
• The means to enjoy family holidays and times together and to capture these.

This new years eve, I wish you those things too. Yes it would be great to win the lottery, but money does not bring happiness and contentment. 

I wish you all a peaceful new year, I hope you fulfil more dreams and your health remains good. That the losses of the year gone will be outweighed by the pleasure still to come.

I no longer make resolutions, because they are too easy to break, instead I make a list of short term and long term goals I hope to achieve in the following year. I may not get there, but at least it gives me a focus.

Most of all, as my children grow at lightening speed I intend to enjoy them all as much as I can, before my house is silent and they are all long gone.

Thankfully I have a good few years left.

God bless.

Christmas Day is all about a special baby.....

On Christmas Day I would firstly like to wish everyone who reads this a wonderful day. We had a fantastic day which I will write about later on.

At Christmas we remember the birth of a very special baby, Jesus.

Today, I would like to share four more 'current' special babies.

The first, are our wonderful little blessings above, who are a constant joy and light in all of our lives.

The second, is my friend Sharon's new baby. I have written about Sharon and her daughter Freya in one of my previous blogs.

http://beavans11familyblog.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/pre-labour-c-section-could-have-saved.html

Mia, is now 13 days old, born at 31 weeks and not expected to survive on day 3 when she was severely ill. Amazingly she has, against all odds pulled through and is now off intensive care and in the special care baby unit. We thank God today for her incredible recovery and pray this will continue.

Lastly, is Joshua, who although in reality he would be 9.5 years old, he will, forever be our baby. We went to the hospital chapel as we always do on Christmas Day to dress the tree, light candles and remember him, as well as visiting Sharon.

Tomorrow myself, Miriam, Martha, Jono and Luke will remember him by plunging into the North Sea to raise valuable funds (Roughly £500 so far) for our charity www.joshuasboxes.co.uk. Some other wonderful souls will be joining us as well.

I wish you all a wonderful Christmas, and at this time remember the families who do not have a baby, have suffered a recent loss, and for the 20 families in the U.S.A having the most painful of Christmas's without one of their precious children present.

So this is Christmas....part two-Traditions

 Over the many years we have had the children, traditions have slowly and gradually developed out of life's events and things we feel are special and should be remembered. As the children grow and change some of these events have been replaced by others, some remain constant and if altered the children would all complain loudly!

I have for a long time, felt that the lead up to Christmas begins with packing the Christmas Boxes for Operation Christmas child. We have now packed boxes for 13 years and feel not only does it obviously help supply a present to one of many, many children who will receive nothing at Christmas time, but also, it reminds us that Christmas is a time go giving and how important that is. In a world, so filled with greed and commercialism I think it's important to start the season remembering those less fortunate than ourselves.

After this, on the night of the 4th and day of the 5th December, since living in Prague we celebrate Mikulas.

Mikulas (explanation follows)

When the children were little and we lived in the school, we used to dress up as Mikulas (Simon/dad) Andel (angel) and Cert (devil) we always choose one of our own children for the devil so as not to offend any parents and maybe lead to any misinterpretation as to why their child was chosen!!!

When we moved back there were some Czech students at the school we worked in so we continued to dress up. Now the children are older we still maintain it by making stacks of gingerbread to the Czech recipe (so much nicer). The children's friends , over the years have now come to expect them to bring in gingerbread at the beginning of December. We usually make around 3-400!!

The next thing we like to do with the children is to take them to some of the special events going on locally to help the Christmas build up. This year this included a trip to the local garden centre who had created the most amazing grotto and to Betws y Coed where they had a Christmas Market and candle march through the village. Some years we have gone ice skating when small rinks have been erected or to the larger Christmas Markets in Manchester.

Our tree is very unusual, as I posted last year with a description of each decoration. Each year we take the younger ones to choose some new and meaningful decorations, Mair went with gusto around the shop and we came away with a few more than bargained for!

We then spend a day or two putting up the tree with Christmas czech Carols and movies going on. All the children help from time to time and take great care with all the little things we put on. It is always much better with the tree, and lights up around the house, apart from having to move furniture to get it there in the first place!

This year I was very worried about the twins pre occupation with anything that is not a toy! I have been pleasantly (touches wood) surprised at their control over the tree after a few harsh "no's" they have kept away by and large....so far.

We try to watch at least one 'christmassy' film each weekend in the build up, as life is so busy in the week. The week before the children break up , is always utter madness and this year has been no exception! We are always left, no matter how hard we try , with a last minute rush on our hands.

Christmas Eve, is the day we celebrate (european style) with our meal in the evening. This has worked very well over the years as it has given us freedom on Christmas day to , in the past travel to my mothers home, and now for the eldest ones to have christmas lunch with their partners families each year without any arguments.

Dad cooks all the meal, admist a blaring out of classical music. He has done for years now and does it so well, no one has ever replaced him! We try to make it a bit more unusual and add a variety of things each year. The children all enjoy helping to make the pesto, and prepare the vegetables with dad. After we have prepared the food, I take the children out to the church service to leave dad some peace and quiet, but also for us to calm down and reflect with Christmas is all about.                                                                                     

When we have finished our meal and tided up we open some presents and then get the youngest children to bed. We allow the older ones to stay up and watch TV, thus meaning everyone goes to bed late and sleeps in on Christmas Day! Bliss!!!!

On Christmas Day we have a 'birthday party for Jesus' which basically means I put a lot of snack and party food on our huge table and the kids eat all day.Simon and I can then play with the children, help them construct toys and unwind rather than feeling the pressure of having to cook a formal meal.

At some point in the after noon we all make ourselves presentable and go to the hospital chapel where we remember Joshua. we have often taken sweets and cakes to the SCBU as well for the parents there.

We light candles for him and all his angel friends and place tags on the tree for our loved ones , so now , sadly for the second year this will include my mother as well, who is still much missed on Christmas Day.

Then we all come home and just enjoy being together and not having to do anything much at all!

For the past three year on Boxing Day I have attended the Boxing Day Dip, where a group of truly mad people all run into the sea for charity and some of my friends do this for Joshua's Boxes. For some strange reason this year I have agreed to do it. Lord knows why , as I hate water, cold and the sea! I will probably end up with a dreadful cold as well.

If you feel urged to sponsor me to do this, please do so on:

Just Giving

The rest of the holiday is spent doing a mixture of things including going to the local pantomime which is always very enjoyable.

On New Years Eve, we go bowling! our yearly 'treat' and then to Pizza Hut where again it's once a year as we rarely eat out as a family for obvious reasons! Again it's a lovely event that the children enjoy and look forward too.

I am sure as they get older still and move away and have families of their own they too will maintain some of these traditions as I am also sure we will adapt and incorporate new ones.

Traditions are lovely, they bring a special meaning to Christmas for us, they are looked forward too and talked about each year and are eagerly anticipated as well.

What are yours?

Still here!

I have not felt able to write this week, as however much I tried it all sounded to shallow and meaningless.
After a death nearer to home, hearing of the sudden sadness at the loss of a child, my dear friends new born baby in SCBU very poorly and then the shootings of 20 children exactly the same age as Mair, I struggle to think of very much else.
I cannot begin to comprehend the absolute horror of finding out your child has been shot, let alone gunned down several times with a rifle, to have injuries so horrific you cannot see them, but rather have to identify them by a photograph.
My mothering instinct would kick in, I would long to hold them, one last time, to be denied this, must make the pain so much worse.
I would be wondering what my child's last moments were like and would be tormented by these.
To kiss your child goodbye in the morning never realising it was for the very last time, is something no parent should endure, yet many have.
To write about my own family and it's trivialities at such a time, feels empty and hollow.
Instead, if you are reading this, pray for those families, cherish your own, live each day too the full, because we never know if it will be our last.

Sometimes we need to press the 'pause' button

I haven't written so much recently, because I have had several things going on personally that have distracted my attention and focused it rather sharply on where it needs to be.
Of course, in such a large family, when the pause button is pressed, this inevitably means that there is then a backlog of jobs that need to be done, when one resumes normal life again.

I am somewhere in between the two at present and with Christmas now looming on the horizon, my original smugness at being so organised has subsequently evaporated.
I am on near panic mode, or at least I will be by the end of the week.
Coupled with the fact the twins-who-never-sleep have decided to up their nigh time antics to a level where some nights we have just dealt with one after the other ALL night, and I mean ALL NIGHT!
Too their credit, they are so charming and adorable during the day it is hard to feel any animosity towards them, or maybe I am just too tired.
I can do tired, and really tired, but I think my levels of exhaustion hit and all time, 24 year childbearing low by last weekend.

As I said, sometimes life takes over.
On Monday, I had to drop work, and rearrange appointments to attend my friends mum's funeral in London. Her mother had been very kind to me as a child and obviously throughout the years we have kept in touch. It was an extremely moving service and although sad, she was an incredible lady who had lived her life too the full.
I left home at 6am and arrived back at 10pm.

On the way home, I walked from Waterloo Station along the Embankment filled with row upon row of Christmas markets, over Waterloo Bridge and through Covent Gardens and Leicester Square, old haunts as a teenager and enjoyable as for once I was on my own and not being pulled away every 2.5 seconds.

For all that, as I often find , after a couple of hours on my own, that was enough, I missed the children and all that was happening with them, so headed back to Euston and my busy, mad. chaotic life.
When we press the pause button and events take over, it gives us time to reflect, to put things once again in order and to appreciate what really matters, where to place our energy and what a waste other things really are.

At this time of year, it is especially good to do this, to put behind the mistakes and to know that a new year can bring a new start, a chance to do things differently and to make changes.

I have had a little time to sit back and reflect and feel all the better for having done so.

So this is Christmas...part three - how we celebrate

Christmas Eve is spent frantically taking everything we can outside to make room for the presents and to get out the table. As I run and charity from home, as well as keep all my lecturing work at home this involves quite an upheaval. Then we clean and tidy, help Dad prepare things and usually go to church for the carol service. This year because of illness we were running behind so Susie took Mair to the service and I followed at the end part.

Everyone comes for the evening meal, our Christmas dinner. We give the babies a late sleep so they are awake and not winging. This year we broke with tradition and just had chicken as we all concluded we prefer it to turkey!

Afterwards the children give each other the presents they have brought. Some of the children club together to get larger items and to make their money stretch further. After this is done they can choose a couple of presents from mum and dad too open before a late bedtime.

 Once everyone is eventually in bed Simon and me sit and do the stockings and take these around the house. Usually people sleep in till around 9am and then open their stockings so it gives us a nice leisurely start to the day (I do not do early mornings)

The elder children come around 10 am and we all open the presents then, have breakfast/lunch/brunch and play with these. When the babies are asleep we have more buffet food, and watch a film or play a game.

Later on when the babies wake, we all go to the hospital to light candles and to remember Joshua and all my friends babies as well. Some of my friends live miles away and cannot get to memorial services or do the things we can so I hope this helps them too.

This year, Sharon was in the hospital with baby Mia, so came down to join us as well. Joshua will always be part of our family on Christmas Day.

On Boxing Day I go to Llandudno to support those who bravely jump into the sea to support my charity, this year I was! Along with Jono, Martha, Luke and Miriam. We tried to smile! My friend Paula and Nina were also doing it as well.

As you can see we all survived and then went home to warm up and watch a lovely film for the rest of the afternoon.

During the Christmas break we also visit the panto and love to go each year.

We try to take the children to do some more unusual things and hope this year to take them ice skating next week.

On New Years Eve we all go bowling and then to Pizza Hut, defiantly a once a year treat that everyone looks forward too. As the children get older some go to parties, others come back and join us, it is always a movable feast that involves me in a taxi run at silly o'clock!

I love all our traditions and the way we celebrate and I would not have it any other way.

I hope you have all enjoyed your own.

So this is Christmas..... part one-Presents

In amongst the wrapping paper there is a child!

As John Lennon sings once again over speakers in hot, over crowed shops.
'So what have you done?
another year over, and a new one just begun."
Well not quite yet, but we have hit the Christmas season once again.
I can fight it no longer.
I have of course been buying presents as and when I am able too, as the family size kind of dictates these cannot be bought in one large swoop, unless I won the lottery!
My children have no close relatives, or close friendship groups, so they only ever receive presents from us.
I feel the pressure. I know their friends will come into school bragging about the wads of cash collected as they visit a multitude of relations over the Christmas season, and feel acutely aware, that good as my children are, the present buck, so to speak, stops with us.
It is always a hard line to draw. Not too over spend, however not to make them feel that because of our family size, they come off worse than anyone else (in their eyes, that is. Starting to draw comparisons with the third world isn't helpful on Christmas morning I have found).
Christmas is the one time, I do spend quite a lot on the children, because , I hate to admit it, it is a special time of year and I do want them to enjoy it, and like it or not, at this time material possessions do matter to some of them.

Well, I thought I spent a lot, until that is, I was talking to some of my students and I realised that I actually spent comparatively next to them!
I have often been asked if I had a smaller family size would I infact spend more. I doubt it.
I was brought up in quite an austere setting, as both my parents came from hard working , but quite low income (well in my dad's case poor, backgrounds). As an only child they did not want to spoil me so I was bought 'sensible' things. There came a point in my childhood where I really wanted things that were not sensible and we clashed. After my father died, my mum could not afford much, the presents were less, but at least what I wanted, rather than what I needed. It did however bring me up with a healthy disreguard for over indulgence of any kind!
We try to have a balance at Christmas between 'wants' and 'needs'. Sometimes the two are the same, a mobile phone is a good example of this.
Here are a few of the fun and the practical things each child receives:

• Pyjamas
• DVD
• CD
• Books
• Stationary
• Christmas socks
• Christmas pants
• Under wear
• Sweets
• Felt pens and glitter pens
• Stickers
• Jewellery
• bath stuff
• Makeup
• Hair bits and bobs

Obviously these things vary depending on the child's sex and age.

The good thing about being a large family is they can all enjoy each others DVD's and CD's and books. The girls often share and swop the clothes and so it feels like they have more than infact they have.

On top of this, they are encouraged to choose one or two larger items. For the younger ones this is often lego and games and for the older ones it has been mobile phones, DVD players, and music devices, clothes or money for clothes in the sales.

We have sometimes been very stretched for money and sometimes have had a bit more over the years. It is amazing what you can buy with very very careful planning, a lot of trekking around and scanning the internet for the best deals. You can actually not have to spent a fortune all of the time.

If the children want/need a large item, such as a laptop, bike etc, then they have to have this as a joint present for their birthday and Christmas combined.

We have also bought smaller presents for them all, but bought a large one for the family, such as our large trampoline one year, swings set, and wii and games. This allows you to spent less but buy an item they will all get pleasure from.

To be able to afford Christmas, is a question I am often asked. I have to put money aside each month and I also do extra marking for GCSE RE during the summer months to pay for this, as well as our summer holiday. It is some what frustrating when people assume we just rely on benefits when infact sometimes we can both have two or three jobs.

I have always felt, as much as I can, and without spoiling the children, that I do not want them to feel hard done by for being part of a large family. Most of the time I am sure they see all the benefits of being one of many, however Christmas is a time I like them to feel more individual as well.

I put hours and hours into buying the right things, unusual things and making things for them. I love to watch them on Christmas Day, for me that is the most pleasurable part, playing their new games with them, snuggling down with them watching DVD's and silly TV and sharing in their special day. Christmas, really is so much more fun with children, lots of children!!!!

Babies and teenagers-hilarously similar

I came home today, and as usual had about a million jobs to do, most not self inflicted.
As I was tidying around with the babies in tow, the blinding reality hit me.
Teenagers and babies are very similar!
By some strange quirk of evolution babies grow up and become nice, responsible children, then for a period of about 4-5 years there seems to be an evolutional regression back to babyhood before the realities of adulthood and the responsibilities involved kick in.
Perhaps God designed it this way, as a sort of shield to give them one last little break before never ending adulthood embarks upon them?
So, you may ask, what are these similarities.
Here's my list, survived two teenagers, living with 4 teens and one pre teen (and with another three waiting to hit those years) as well as years of teaching teens has helped this list! I am sure you will be able to add to this.

• Babies tip everything out and leave a mess that they are incapable of tidying up themselves, teenagers make a mess, leave mugs, plates, bowls, towels etc out and 'seem' incapable of tidying up themselves (until threatened!)
• Babies scream and cry because they cannot vocalise what they want, teenagers scream and appear incapable of explaining whats wrong as well.
• Babies can't tell you whats bothering them, teenagers refuse too!
• Babies make a mess over their clothes by doing silly things in them, teenagers mess up their clothes by doing equally stupid things in them!
• Babies can make a fuss going to bed and wake up a lot at night, teenagers do not like going to bed at night and stay up as late as possible!
• It is hard to understand baby speak, it is equally hard to understand teenage boy grunting!
• Babies don't like to wash, neither do teenage boys!
• Babies can be very fussy eaters, teenagers are equally fussy (after a long period of eating everything put in front of them).
• You need to know where babies are all the time for their own safety, ditto teenagers!!!!
• Babies have no concept of money, ditto some teenagers!
• Babies demand a lot of attention, ditto teenagers!
• Babies need to be organised, ditto teenagers!
• Babies like messing around on a computer, so do teenagers.
• Babies love listening to music and dancing in a totally un co ordinated way, teenagers like doing this as well.
• Babies love pulling funny faces to make adults laugh, as the picture below clearly shows, so do teenagers.

I had quite a laugh looking at the babies and then understanding that my teens had more in common with them than they think! Not all of the list applies to my own children, I may hasten to add!!