Bootcamp week two...and so the struggle to shift the weight continues

I guess at this stage I should be glowing, bouncing around and telling you all it doesn't hurt any longer and I am finding it so much easier.
I would be lying!
I am slowly realising that at my age, and with the weight I have to loose, my lifestyle etc dramatic weight loss isn't going to happen any longer.
I have to be patient and see the long term goals rather than get so despondent if in a couple of weeks I am not back to my former size.
I was not blessed with patience.
I got very despondent.
I wanted to binge.
Then I looked at the scales and a miracle had happened , I lost 4 lbs.
The next day was Martha's birthday, the day after her party...big fail! I relaxed, basking in my sudden loss, and now I have to pay for it. I put on 2 lbs out of the 4 I lost.
ArgHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
There are times I seriously hate God for giving me such an awful genetic make up.
I hate my husband for being able to stuff anything he wants and never, EVER have to think about the consequences.
So, week 2.
I have killed myself at Bootcamp and managed five sessions. For some bizarre reason this has resulted in me putting on 1/2 inch on my bust! however my waist is down 1/4 inch, and my thighs are too. Not as much as I had hoped. But I guess 2lbs lighter and a slight loss is better than none at all.
I keep reminding myself I am going in the right direction, albeit slowly, very slowly.
Is it easier getting up at 5.55 am?
No. In fact week 2 was harder.
I lay in bed giving myself all manner of excellent reasons why not to get up, and justified them all.
But get up I did, and I am glad.
Boy is it hard to kill yourself at 6.30am.
I am glad we all face a mirror, as it reminds me in all fullness of flab why I am there!
It is also a great deterrent for not going to Mc Donald's, eating cakes and biscuits, etc, because having dragged myself out of bed in the cold and dark I am sure as anything not then going to waste that by eating the wrong things.
I am slowly finding ways of eating the right things even when I am pushed for time, which is one of the hardest things when you have such a large family and so much going on.
I am re educating my snacks and learning to munch on cold slices of chicken and celery instead of biscuits and crisps.
I have eliminated all alcohol, not a huge sacrifice, and also all but one cup of coffee (a huge sacrifice!)
I have found, eventually some herbal teas I actually enjoy!
So there we are. I still feel terribly fat. I hate how I look and still cannot fit my clothes. These are all positives to keep on going at least.
On the brighter side, I am defiantly feeling I have more energy, and the days I don't do bootcamp I miss the exercise and routines....Faint!
Let's see what I can achieve this week.